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Patrick: Do I have a sexy partner like Rehman Rashid had with Angie Ng or do I have to do it myself?

We were thinking of the duck
Patrick: (Sneaky laugh) Duck...

Is the duck sexy enough for you?
Patrick: I don't know. Nobody has told me. According to what I read in the Star, which is how I got to know about it, the suspension is for one month. But my management, my employers, in this case Radio 4 and RTM, has not said anything official to me as to whether it is a suspension, whether it is a termination or what.

When was the last time you were on air?
Patrick: Oh, long time ago. I came back from Phuket on the 14th (March) and I hadn't been on the air since the 3rd (April). How it happened was really funny actually. When I came back from Phuket, I had a frantic message on my answering service from a friend of mine, who lives in Kuantan. When I called her back, she said, "Oh, Patrick, I am so glad I got you, you know because it's Sunday night and I have some news to tell you. I don't want you to be embarrassed by going to work tomorrow morning. You have been taken off the air." This friend of mine has absolutely nothing to do with the radio at all.

How did she find out, then?
Patrick: She's a housewife in Kuantan. I think she found out after she spoke to one of the DJs at the radio station. I don't know who it is.

And they wouldn't have told you until you have gone to work the next day?
Patrick: Probably. I think to be fair to them, they would have told me. Unbeknownst to this friend of mine in Kuantan, the following Monday, I had taken off anyway. I would not have gone to work on Monday, and they probably would have called me up on Monday to say, "Sorry, you are out." So, when I got the news from Kuantan, I called the controller, and she said, "Yeah, you have been taken off the schedule for an indefinite period."
And that was the last I heard of it until the Star printed the article on page 3 saying that I have been suspended.

How did the media, the Star and The Malay Mail, got wind of this?
Patrick: That's the RM64,000 question. Probably, somebody from the station told them. In the days after that, Malay Mail was trying to get hold of me. The Star and the Sun was calling me to comment on the suspension, but I didn't really comment.

Would you like to clear the air, with regards to the duck issue?

Patrick: There has been a lot of negative feedback on the duck issue. It was merely an April Fool prank, and there has been a lot of reaction from people, not so much that I had used the national radio to play a prank, not so much that the ducks were made to dance on a hot plate, but I suspect that people are upset because their ego had been dented. "Ohh, I got fooled, shit! How can you this to me?" It is the I-me-my syndrome again. Nothing to do with the ducks or the radio. "It's me, you fooled me. Bastard, how could you dare do that?" And that's what they are getting me for, which I think is bloody silly.

People have even said to me: April Fool joke is western culture, and I say, f**k you too-lah. Do you wear a tie, do you celebrate Christmas, do you take your secretary out on Secretary's Day, do you send flowers on Valentine's Day? If that's not Western influence, what is? So, don't talk to me about influences.

My answer to them is: Can't you take a joke? Lighten up a little bit, you know. So, if you think Patrick Teoh played a joke on you this year, be inventive. Think up something, I will get you Patrick, bastard, next year I will play a joke on you.

People in this country seem to be too caught up in this chase for material...I don't know how to put it into words. This social development is too much weighted against in the favour of material gains. People's social and psychological development hasn't kept pace with that. It is like we still have the kampung mentality living in the big city, with skyscrapers and LRTs and all that. Basically, our mind is still bicycles, that kind of mentality. And a lot of people, I think, are finding a lot of difficulty in dealing with people like that.

Do you find that inherent in your listeners, when they call you up?
Patrick: Yeah. In the months that I have been doing this programme, it is very evident that a lot of these listeners know how to complain but don't know how to discuss and communicate. They will ring up and say, (putting on a colloquial accent), "You know-ah, I want to bring up to your attention-ah, this rubbish collection problem in my area." But when you try to draw them into a discussion, they can't. They just want to know, what are you going to do for me, always standing there for a handout. Complain, complain, complain; give me, give me, give me. That's one of the problems.

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